4“When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice.”
Advance note: This account might be too wordy for some. It was written with details in the intention to testify. But to experience the same experience it tells, to savor the essentials, I pray that by God’s will and grace, you will also begin to listen to His voice.
On the final day of the Every Nation prayer and fasting for 2017, God gave me an early present for the year.
Although I have been saved more than four years ago, that day marked the first time that I intentionally listen and seek to hear from God, not to be saved, but to inquire the Father of His ‘say’ on the usual matters: what to say to people, and what to do for today.
“You are My son. You are my beloved. You are dear to me”, I heard God speaking to me.
It was really hard to accept these words. I failed miserably in many aspects of life, and I lost track of the count of how many times. Thinking back, I was a liar in my childhood. I deceived people. I was a murderer, hating my older brother and thinking how I could hurt or kill him especially when he was bullying me (at least that was the way how I perceived his actions toward me). I was an adulterer in my youth. I kept thinking of lustful thoughts toward people, even toward a stranger. So, to hear words of love and assurance from someone was really difficult to comprehend. Not to mention that it was from the Lord of Hosts, the King of kings, the Creator of all the universe in its vastness!
He has been telling me those words even before. But I was so lost, and was stubborn to hear. Instead, I listened to many other voices of this world.
“It’s okay to be sexually impure. You’re a man. Everyone does it anyway.” And, “It’s okay to lie down all day. Just browse through Facebook and you will some verses, that will do. After that, you can play and watch all day.” And when I just came from attending a Sunday service, or just trying to do what I know is right before the Lord, the enemy will also say, “You’re not man enough, you can’t do that.” “You’re a failure. You are weak and you don’t have what it takes. Just give up.”
BUT that day, by His grace, I accepted those words from my Father.
“You are my own. You are my sheep. You know me and I will lead you. You will follow because you know my voice.” These words of acceptance and affirmation freed me from the curse of years of covering my spiritual ears from His gentle nudging. And I started to enjoy praying and talking to Him, not as a stranger anymore nor like someone who you know just by name, but as a Father who genuinely and dearly loves me despite of my flaws and shortcomings.
“Forget that you were a deceiver, a murderer, an adulterer. Forget those heinous sins you did countless times before. My Son paid for that, and now, I will do everything in My power to make you feel loved, to make you feel accepted and wanted. I shall mold you to be the man I planned and purposely designed you to be. I will make sure that when the Day comes, I shall come for you and I will bring you to my house and we will be together.”
Blessed be the Lord our God!